Featuring the works of Anthony D'Juan Shelton
by Anthony D'Juan Shelton
kiss with criticism
to even hormones
tamed with insecure measures
the bomb ticks between her subtext
practiced innocence of the eyes
me
as her employee
gone as the days of my gutsy wrath
her wholesome piranhas chew away my layers
simplify my being to suit her emotional wardrobe
kiss with criticism
sends the chill to my loins
i squint to purge normalcy
to think:
"with all your good i've said nothing but bad of you"
her good holds motives 'gainst my evil purity
her selfless claims bolster narcissism
me
put last as her rights of claim
in lack for emotions of love
her luke warm fire burns tobacco
pretending to boil water
her tone condescends purpose
like attempt to drown pawned off as Baptism
kiss with criticism in one breath
deports promised future
she's docked her life to my inner tube
& i slowly decompress to her crumpled fold
i'm placed beneath her deck
doomed to dilate my own reparations
by Anthony D'Juan Shelton
i watched a thousand deaths in my brain
empowered by malice
re-runs ablaze in repeats of ruins
the urge to seek fallen quills on scattered streets
reproached in transparent skin of ghostly face
floundered by let down
poverty's melting pot
heart break
& God
we've hardly spoke since my relapse
my return to clear headed chaos reset the clock
which timed out in helpless pity
i'm told it can't be controlled
how these darkened summers navigate my swagger
how i seek trouble for troubled heart
torn out by my own hands
how expectations expects resistance
& God expects reactions indentured
by this i track back
in black outs
covered in blood of my enemy
the enemy of me
by Anthony D'Juan Shelton
it's every where i go
& where i go
anyone can be a nigga
nigga's a free for all
nigga's a trademark
nigga's a word without hue
nigga
so many niggas i didn't know were niggas
all the niggas i knew --
before i knew these niggas
-- knew they were niggas
the niggas i see callin' "nigga"
are niggas who nig'ogiated
wit' nigga style
nigga ways
nigga grammar
nigga stanzas
these niggas call it out like
"nigga" don't come wit' beat downs
like nigga don't cause no waves
like nigga's the thing to be
oh my niggas
how many niggas can be niggas?
the Mexican niggas out'side the liquor sto'
nod their heads to me
"what's up?"
"what's up?"
then they carry on
"gimme my cigarettes, nigga."
"nigga i don't got yo' cigarettes."
"which one'uh you niggas got my cigarettes?"
"fuck you nigga! i ain't got shit!"
the Vietnamese niggas gave me glares
on the other side of town
hardly spoke English
but "nigga" was crisp and clear
"tag-a, tag-a, tag-a nigga"
"nigga tag-a, tag-a, tag-a"
"tag-a nigga tag-a nigga tag-a tag-a?"
"nigga!"
i hold my breath
contain my annoyance
buy my smokes
but the Indian nigga behind the counter
and never gave eye contact
as he talked on the phone:
"that's funny nigga."
"oh nigga please."
"nigga, you don't even know
(to me) $4.50
(phone) nah nigga, just this nigga here buyin' cigs..."
the white niggas give me gasp
for they hide it in quotes
"…I'm the nigga ya love tuh hate."
"…but she ain't messin' wit' no broke niggas."
"…I be hatin' sucka emcees/and the sucka niggas..."
one hand on my shoulder
callin' me "bro" (not nigga)
as they break down the "nigger" verses "nigga"
20 year old argument
that still ain't found reason for justification
(for since i'm "bro" i suppose...it's suppose to be okay)
rape and pillage comes to mind
as the howls of slave ghosts fill my ears
while self-defined niggas educate on non'sense
a response from culture
from "the way it is"
from the new world pop culture
where EVERYONE can be a nigga
where EVERYONE's an expert on nigga'nomics
and grave nigga politics
where we're told (by niggas) that
"it ain't about skin color...it's about equality."
and now that we equal you feel it's right to mock me?
to mis'guide your ignorance to corrupt my intellect
while squeezin' the ass of black girls
to
justify your bullshit
they all niggas till the emancipation
gets yanked...
...then all these self-made niggas
shall walk free in the direction of peace
while the real niggas hang and burn
with cut genitals
and pregnant mothers whipped by Masters
who shame their pride
and starved children
cryin' for they Mammies
while men suffer death
by burning cross
and shortness of breath...
...
...
...(breathe in)
...niggas are so cool ain't they?
we the cream of America
- what's not cool about that?
we shaped your music
language
culture
speech
literature
sports
government
parenting
all methods that began with us
so why would they not want to be niggas?
"niggas is a beautiful thing" said Thomas Jefferson Byrd
mimicry is the best form of flattery
...but how much more flattery will there be
before the flattery is empty like
recession locked establishments
hollowed out like section 8 housing
- after hostile take overs
how many niggas can there be?
when all the niggas i see
stopped bein' niggas
the day they knew they was free?
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